Iowahawk Declares Five Days of Helicopter Jokes

This very sad thing happened. An Iranian official, President Raisi, died in a helicopter crash. Known as the “butcher of Tehran” and crusher of reformers, the United States State Department and other radical leftists as well as Islamic fundamentalists sent their condolences.

I hereby declare five days of public mourning and offer my condolences to the dear Iranian nation.

— Khamenei.ir (@khamenei_ir) May 20, 2024

Tragically, the pro-Hamas students have gone home for the summer, so Ebrahim Raisi won’t get the eulogy he so richly deserves. At least Iran’s hardline fundamentalists will be able to pay proper respects.

(puts finger to earpiece)

Wait. I’m being informed that Iowahawk will be declaring a special period of mourning to honor the good former President Raisi.

I hereby declare five days of helicopter jokes https://t.co/4KAM35V9k3

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) May 20, 2024

Let us all face Austin, Texas and pay our Iowahawk tribute to our fallen terrorist.

What was the last thing to go thru Raisi mind?
The tail rotor.
________________________
Did you know Raisi was on the radio today? Also the instrument panel and the windshield.

— Stuart (@Ringo6) May 20, 2024

Classic!

As allah as my witness, I thought Iranian presidents could fly.

— RWNutjob (@Stickelliott) May 20, 2024

WKRP in Tehran.

This weekend was quite the whirlwind.

— Federalist Musket🇺🇸 (@Patriot_Musket) May 20, 2024

OK, now that we go the puns out of the way …

BREAKING: Iran releases transcript of cockpit recordings:

Pilot: We might have to try an emergency landing on the mountain

Copilot: On the mountain?! What is it??

Pilot: It’s a land mass that projects conspicuously above its surroundings but that’s not important right now

— I. Noah Guy (@Decentguyusedto) May 19, 2024